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Information for Transplant Recipients

This section of Living Donors Online is for those of you who are actual or potential transplant recipients (not donors).

Where Do I Find Information on Organ Transplants?

The world wide web contains a wealth of information for individuals who are considering or have undergone organ transplantation. Here are some sample sites to assist you:

How Do I Find Someone to Donate to Me?

Most living donors have a biological or emotional tie to the recipient. That means the most likely way to find a living donor is to ask family and friends. Make sure everyone who is close to you is aware of your need for an organ transplant.

Another potential source of living donors is from organizations with which you have an affiliation. The most typical is a religious organization—church, synagogue, mosque, prayer circle, or other spiritual group. Other organizations include clubs, alumni associations, fraternities or sororities, professional groups, and so on. Your co-workers may also be a source for living donors.

Finally, you might make an appeal through local mass media, such as newspapers, radio, and television, or the Internet. Doing so gets the word out to a large number of people.  However, be aware that many transplant centers in the US don't allow donation by someone who was identified through mass appeals. Policies vary, so check with your transplant center before starting a mass appeal effort of your own.

You will occasionally see postings on the LDO message board and related message boards from people saying they are willing to donate. Please proceed with caution when dealing with these people. They are strangers and you should treat them as such until you are confident of their true motives. In addition, a stranger willing to donate to you still must pass the battery of tests and screens needed to ensure they are physically, emotionally, and financially prepared for donation. And, as mentioned previously, many transplant centers don't allow donation by someone you contacted through the Internet.

How Do I Ask Someone to Donate an Organ to Me?

LDO asked several transplant recipients who received their organ from a living donor how they asked people to donate to them. Interestingly, in most cases, they did not have to ask. Family members and friends were aware of the recipient's situation and often volunteered to be considered for donation. Here are some examples of the responses to our question "How did you ask someone to donate to you?":

"I didn't ask directly. I made it very clear what my situation was, and what options were available to me. I discussed how transplants happen, through cadaver and living donors. And several people who were interested volunteered once I explained that living-related [donation] is an option, which they were not aware of. "

"The word got out that I needed a kidney, and my sister volunteered without being asked. I also had the parents of a girl I coached in soccer volunteer to be tested, some in-laws, and two people from work. I personally found it easier to accept from my sister than if I had to accept from another - not sure why that is. If you have a large circle of friends and/or acquaintances, get the word out somehow. If someone volunteers, YOU have to make the decision. Even looking back sometimes, it seems like an incredibly self-serving thing I did by taking it. But there wasn't a question in her mind--she had 2 middle-schoolers and a 3-year-old at the time. She never faltered or doubted, at least not in my presence. Not sure how one would 'ask' someone to do it that as not come forward and volunteered. Not sure I could do that. I've said this here before (and I'm not a very religious person) but my sister justified her actions by saying she saw this as her "ticket to heaven - no matter what I do with the rest of my life. Pretty cool."

"I was truly blessed in never having to ask any one to donate for me. Even though I'm an adult living in a state far from my parents, they flew out to visit me while I was still in the hospital with kidney failure and making arrangements to begin dialysis. Both of my parents asked to be tested and had blood drawn before I ever left the hospital. Both of them continued testing until the transplant team required a decision be made as to which one to further test. My little cousin also called and talked to my parents to see if he could be tested. We decided to not have him tested at this time but maybe in the future if I needed one down the road since he is much younger. My parents wanted input from me on which one to choose but I refused to decide. Eventually, they decided by weighing many factors into the equation including income and nursing ability. I got my mother's kidney and my father provided the nursing care for both mother and I, as he is more emotionally stable and has a better income."

However, if you find yourself in the position of having to ask someone to donate to you, here are suggestions from other living-donor organ recipients:

  • Make sure the people close to you are aware you need an organ transplant.

  • Inform everyone about cadaveric and living donation. Many people do not understand living organ donation. Sharing information on the subject may encourage them to become a donor to you.

  • Consider the situation and personality of the person you are going to ask. Do they prefer the direct approach? Would you be better off having a third party approach them? Do you need to help them think through the issues they may have to deal with as a potential donor, such as care for children or dealing with time off from work?

There are as many different ways to ask as there are people to ask. Here is one approach:

" I think I would start with a brief description of my situation so the potential donor understood the reason for my asking. Then I would ask. I would add that they should feel no obligation to do it; that it is an important personal decision. And I think I would say they don't need to make up their minds at that point--that they should take time to educate themselves before making the commitment. I say these things because I believe a potential donor may make a hasty, emotionally-driven decision on the spot without having a full appreciation of what's involved. Then they may feel stuck if they need to back out, say, for financial reasons. So, the request might go something like this.... 'I want to ask you something very important. As you know, I've been sick, and my kidneys are now to the point where they can no longer support me. I have to go on dialysis or get a transplant. This is an important decision, so please take your time deciding... would you be willing to consider donating a kidney to me?' If the answer is no, then I think the patient needs to just leave it at that. If the answer is yes, I think it would be helpful if the patient could tell the potential donor a bit more about what's involved or point them to a resource that could give them that information."

If you are a transplant recipient and you received the organ from a living donor, please share how you asked potential donors. Please write us with your story.

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© 2008 International Association of Living Organ Donors, Inc.